Gifts and presence 🎁

And what it feels like to be 37

Hubby doing a surf lesson on the Oregon coast. My daughter joined for 5 minutes, rode exactly one wave 🌊 and retreated back to the shore.

There’s nothing special about turning 37.

Beyond being in Portland for the last leg of our road trip, it started off like any other day—a 7 am wake-up time, a workout and a bottle of water by 8, and breakfast and a matcha latte by 10. We hit the road by 11, stopped for a late lunch at a roadside cafe, and weaved our way around a 9.5 mile backup on I-5. Thank god I had the foresight to stock my freezer with ready-to-eat proteins and vegetables before we left—we arrived home just before 5, travel-weary with an empty fridge. The highlight of the evening was putting in my scalp treatment, followed by a facial mask, and to be completely honest, I do these things once a week…it just happened to fall on my birthday.

And yet: I have never felt so alive.

I always ask my interviewees about the roles they balance in their life, but have only recently settled on the ones that I prioritize above all else: present mother, supportive spouse, hard-working writer. And that’s exactly how I spent our first day of vacation on the Oregon coast. I built sand castles with my daughter, doing my best to relish every moment before she starts kindergarten in the Fall. A hundred yards away in the water, my husband was learning to surf, checking off a long-standing item from his bucket list. And I did lug out my laptop to write—not a lot, but enough to be satisfied with my progress. No amount of success will change my commitment to these roles, and if anything:

Turning 37 has made me more attuned to moments that may seem insignificant, knowing they are part of a larger story that has yet to play out.

If this were a movie, my internal arc would be completed by now. I would have risen to the call of adventure, stumbled across a mentor, discovered my power and abilities, and vanquished the villain. But sometimes I think we forget that in the real world, doing X + Y doesn’t always equal Z. That gritting your teeth and trying harder doesn’t necessarily result in accomplishing the thing that’s just out of reach, believing that our quest for more money, followers, or *stuff* will quiet the fear that rages inside as we navigate an unpredictable world.

In other words, the happy ending to my story hasn’t been written because I’m focused on embracing these precious moments as a mother to a five-year-old, a wife to a technology leader, and an up-and-coming writer—and honestly?

After living with crippling self-doubt for most of my life about my identity and purpose, 37 feels like a fresh breath of air.

So even though it’s a little taboo to talk about age, I still want to know:

Have you ever had a birthday that meant a lot to you, but didn’t align with the typical milestones?

Leave me a comment and let me know.

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Recently on The Write Life Balance

It’s so clear to me that

Tanmeet Sethi, MD

’s gift is bringing gratitude to the world—and as evidenced by my words above, joy finally feels like something I can fully experience. In case you missed it, our interview is below.

The search for gratitude

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Summer Links 🔗

📚 My husband visited Powell’s and brought me back Jungian psychology texts from Marion Woodman and James Hollis—if that’s not true love, I don’t know what is.

🍫 These made-from-scratch s’mores may have won over this marshmallow hater—I may ship a kit to my door before summer ends.

🔮 Glad someone else noticed the collective unconscious-like feel of Bruno’s character in Encanto! (Also, I am definitely the Mirabel of my family.)

💄 This red lipstick makes me feel like I wandered out of a J.Crew catalog, and now the problem is choosing the next color I want. (Psst…I also swear by their lip oil.)

🥗 Used this deli-style pasta salad recipe as a jumping point for my own variation: black olives, beets, cucumbers, grated carrot, and the best goat cheese I’ve ever tasted.

Happy July,

Sophia :)

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P.S. Summer break is in full swing, so this will be the last issue until September aka when my kid is in full-time school 😭 If you want to talk before then, don’t be shy—shoot me a message!